Monday 30 January 2012

Toilet brush etiquette

Again, time is getting away from me and two weeks have passed since last post. So here's a small one to remedy the lack of communications and then I'll write a bigger one tomorrow.

Here's a handy guide for people on the correct and proper usage of a toilet brush. A toilet brush is not a bathroom accessory that just sits in the corner gathering dust, it is a functional bit of kit, particularly useful for cleaning toilets. Once you are finished on the toilet, particularly after defecating, the correct way to deploy the toilet brush for cleaning is this: pick up the brush with one hand, with your free hand apply pressure to the button/lever that flushes your toilet. Once water is flowing down into the toilet wait for a few seconds until the solids and the toilet paper have gone from sight, then quickly utilise the brush. To do this you submerge the brush into the water and scrub with vigour around the toilet bowl. If you do this your end result will be a shiny, clean toilet that is free from any faecal matter. This is not only pleasant for yourself but also for others that may well use the toilet after you. IT IS ESPECIALLY PLEASANT FOR THE CHALET GIRL THAT HAS TO CLEAN YOUR GOD-DAMNED TOILET!!!

Thank you for reading this handy guide on the correct usage of toilet brushes.

Hasta luego amigos!

Sunday 15 January 2012

Kaleidoscope diamonds

I was cleaning my kitchen the other day as the sun was streaming in the windows. Outside there was a beautiful snowy landscape, fresh mountain air, the sound of birdsong and all around my kitchen danced little dazzling spots of light. No, it wasn't because I was drunk or high off the D2-D10 industrial cleaning chemicals, they were little refractions of sunlight from my diamond earrings. TD bought me those earrings once for my birthday, I still remember it vividly, the look on his face as he presented the box to me. I thought I lost one once, in the shower, it was terrible but of course I found it. He used to think they didn't sparkle enough. Maybe he should've got me the ultra sparkly ones (read expensive) from Tiffany that he boldly asked the shop assistant to show him, with no intention of buying them, he couldn't bear to have walked in and then straight back out because the prices frightened the living shit out of him, so he asked to see a few different kinds then told the helpful assistant he'd think about it and come back. I think my diamonds sparkle just fine, especially in the alpine sun in my chalet kitchen. The little light spots put a smile on my face, made me recall a happy memory and so I wiggled my head around and made them dance all over the place.

I'm flying solo, just like I wanted, but it's hard work I tell you. The team are dropping like flies. RSC did his ACL while skiing, only his fourth time out, no more for the rest of the season. KJ had a drunken run in with a parked car that necessitated an MRI of her head. My roomie got a chest infection and was carted off to hospital (Hopitaux Leman, made me think of RL) two transfer days ago. KB broke her shoulder on a jump in the park (hence why I'm flying solo, cos Milly has had to go run KB's chalet). BW got a shiner the other night, in the hot tub... don't ask! As for me, my thumb tendons have started playing up again and I've had pins and needles in most of the fingers on my left hand for the last two-three weeks. The guests last week, all doctors, thought it was most likely Carpal Tunnel Syndrome. Super. Just what I need. I haven't quite decided what to do about it yet. It's either the ostrich approach and hope for some sort of overnight, miracle recovery or I have to man up and go to the doctor. It's bloody annoying this pins and needles, luckily I'm so busy for most of my waking day that I don't notice it. I especially don't notice it when I'm out riding.

I was thinking about something the other day. How funny it is that when something doesn't go quite according to plan, how we revert to what we had before, or try to in any case. Even though what we had before wasn't actually what we wanted. How odd it is that we find comfort in something familiar even though at one point we decided that we didn't want that and that it was no longer comforting. Weird eh?

Anyway, I realise that my blogging has become more sporadic and I will try to remedy that. I promise. Now that I am flying solo I'm finding that time, especially time off, is a rare thing indeed. I've not been riding since Thursday (yes I know it's only Sunday but in the life of a seasonnaire that's actually a REALLY long time to not have been on the mountain). I will get quicker, I will get more efficient, I will get more sleep so that I can put into effect the first two points raised and once they have been actioned I will be able to go ahead and get more riding done.

New guests today. Got a good tip from the ones that left this morning, really good! I love good tippers. I also love them when they leave behind a full bottle of Gordon's gin, half a bottle of Tanqueray, quarter bottle of Glenlivet and they've been included you in their nightly Taittinger drinking. They were a lovely bunch, reminded me of TD's parents and their friends actually. Funnily enough, the new guests are all doctors again bar two of the party. I had a feeling they'd be young and I was right, they're my age. Seem good fun. Should be a good week!

There's more reasons why this should be a good week. On Tuesday we've got a staff outing. Meaning that most of us have bought tickets to see Krafty Kuts at Opera and guess what? It's day off on Wednesday. Boom! So I think we might tuck into some of the left behind spirits to get us in good spirits! See what I did there, oh I'm funny! Last week's day off was epic, hour long hot stone massage for 30 Euro and then an impromptu drinking session at Tremplin with some awesome drum and bass tunes played by djs, followed by pizza at Mamas. That's not all though, there's more reasons why THIS week is going to be a good week. Three very dear friends of mine are coming to town on Saturday!!!!!!!!!! YAY! I'm so stoked to see them and ride with them and take them out and ... and... and .. SO much stuff!! Oh I am beyond excited to see them!

So now that I've got myself all riled up thinking about that I'm going to go to bed. It's half past midnight and I'm sitting in the stairwell (the internet signal doesn't quite reach my room) and I'm thinking that 6 hours sleep is not going to be enough. But that's all I'm going to get. Soon I will be saying good morning over the heavily laden breakfast table and offering them eggs, and no doubt I shall be scrambling, frying, poaching and omeletting all at the same time. Because that's how it works, why all settle for the same kind of egg when you can really stress the chalet girl by asking for them in a million different ways. Hmmm, when you think about it, an egg is a very versatile food. Thank you chickens for your clever invention.    

It's obviously bed time....

Thursday 5 January 2012

Gap yah, New yah.

New Years Eve, with new friends, was spent in a little bar off the beaten Morzine track. This normally chilled out place where we go to have a few demis after work was transformed into a packed tot he rafters, banging, sweating, drunken drum and bass club for the occasion. It was awesome. Saw a lot of seasonnaires in there and mixed in were a few holiday makers that had wandered away from the usual night spots (that were all charging 10-20 Euro entry fee). It was a pretty damn good night!

From new friends to old friends. I had the pleasure of a visit from my dear friend NG. We've been friends since we were 9-10, from school in Spain. It was so brilliant to see her and her boyf (hasn't he done well for himself to have bagged a girl like her!). They stayed at an awesome place that seems like it's stuck in 1974, I'm going to suggest it to other visitors. Le Laurys it's called and it comes complete with wagon wheels festooned in coloured lights, I mean, what more could you want?!

Today I went riding with my Aussie friend Fi. It was cool as. Great snow up top. My board needs a wax though, desperately. Guess I could spring for a tune up with last week's tip money, which FYI was pretty good.

The snow happiness was cut short though when I got home. I discovered I had not received a meat delivery for the evening meal. I didn't get it until ten past seven. Dinner is served at eight. Challenge accepted and challenge won!

Bed now, we have a bonus night off tomorrow, still have to do kid's dinner but not adults. So I'm thinking, breakfast service, riding, apres, kid's dinner, more apres.

Tuesday 3 January 2012

you could end up with a bunch of care bears or Hitlers...

I work with a guy that I like to call Millhouse. He's a space cadet at the best of times. Today, as we were walking to the office to greet our new guests he said "you could end up with a bunch of carebears or Hitlers...". How very true.

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